Dealing with our loss is still a struggle. I’m finding that whenever my mind isn’t occupied, my thoughts are wandering to to what “should be” and the loss hurts all over again. The more still I sit, I go back to the doctor scanning and scanning with that look on her face, and those horrible words coming out of her mouth. It is driving me crazy and I can’t stop from breaking down at different moments throughout the day.
To help occupy and distract me, we’ve taken on a project that we’ve been wanting to do for a while….painting our kitchen cabinets white. The project is the biggest we’ve undertaken. So far, we’ve taken off all of the cabinet doors and put on a coat of primer and the first coat of paint on the backs. We still need to do another coat on the backs, two coats on the front, and two coats on all of the cabinet frames. We’re hoping to have the painting finished by Wednesday. Then they’ll sit and dry until the weekend so that we don’t risk messing them up when we re-hang. The project is at least masking my back pain with the soreness from bending over to paint the cabinet doors.
I’m excited to see how it will turn out and eager to finish so that we can put our kitchen back in one piece!